To you, to the man I love

12:50:00 AM Valencia Ng 1 Comments

I pray for you and I remember telling story about you last week
Do you remember when I was sick and you accompanied me to the hospital?
Or letting me to sleep on your passenger's seat
Or letting me to have your pillow and I gave you mine?
When you held my hands or when I gave you a kiss on cheek on your birthday?
I wrote this because I know for sure that in front of you I won't say a thing
Not at all. I don't know why I always remain speechless
Yesterday as I just fought my good fight
And you were home, sleeping
As I too often leave you alone
I've been thinking about the things that I may do in the future
Will you accept it? How can I make you understand that?
To be really honest, I don't think about you that often
When I'm too busy doing my stuffs
When I'm too busy trying to make you proud
When I'm too busy trying to impress you
But somehow, today, I got this urge to write this
I feel like I'm doing all these things alone
But not at once I have the bravery to ask you to join me
From the deepest part of my heart I really wish,
really want, really hope, that you may know Him
I just don't know how.
But I pray for you still
I'm sorry if most of the time I'm not there for you
For the times I disrespect
For all the things you kept inside you
I'm not too blind to see it
I'm sorry for the things I do not say
How I'm not able to express my feelings toward you
But I love you, though
I'm sorry if I grew up too fast
That this your little girl has finally spread her wings
I'm aware that now you're growing old
I'm sorry if you gave everything for me
I noticed that when I saw your tired face everytime I go home
Words simply won't suffice
But this, is what I can do for now...
I love you.

Joy

1:21:00 AM Valencia Ng 0 Comments

Hear me, oh God of my fathers
I am lost and bleeding, my strength has run out
I need You now, I need You now

Hear me, oh Alpha Omega
Rest upon me, for I am depleted
Without You, without You

Hear my heart, for I have nothing to offer You
Let me rest in You alone
Let me dance with freedom that only comes from You
May I find my joy again

Speak to me, for I am done speaking
Would You carry me, for I cannot walk
I need You now, I need You now

Would You show me grace, even when I don't deserve it
Find You in this place, would shelter Your servant
For awhile, for awhile

Hear my heart, for I have nothing to offer You
Let me rest in You alone
Let me dance with freedom that only comes from You
May I find my joy again

May I find my joy again
I have found my joy... again

Travel with me?

10:41:00 AM Valencia Ng 0 Comments

I have traveled far now on life’s journey; and, having climbed one of the few remaining hills between earth and Heaven, I stand awhile on this vantage-ground, and look back across the country through which the Lord has led me.

A well-defined pathway is visible, but it appears devious and wandering; sometimes skirting a mountain-top, whence one could catch glimpses of “the land that is very far off”; and, further on, descending into a valley shadowed by clouds and darkness. At one time, it runs along amidst steep places, and overhanging rocks; at another time, it winds across an open plain, brilliant with the sunshine of goodness and mercy, and fanned by breezes which are wafted from the fields of Heaven.
There are flowers of joy and love growing all along the way, even in the dark places; and “trees which the Lord has planted,” give shade and shelter from too great heat.

I can see two pilgrims treading this highway of life together, hand in hand—heart linked to heart. True, they have had rivers to ford, and mountains to cross, and fierce enemies to fight, and many dangers to go through; but their Guide was watchful, their Deliverer unfailing, and of them it might truly be said, “In all their suffering he also suffered, and he personally rescued them. In his love and mercy he redeemed them. He lifted them up and carried them through all the years.”

Mostly, they went on their way singing; and for one of them, at least, there was no joy greater than to tell others of the grace and glory of the blessed King to whose land He was hastening. And when he thus spoke, the power of the Lord was seen, and the angels rejoiced over repenting sinners.
But, at last, they came to a place on the road where two ways met; and here, amidst the terrors of a storm such as they had never before encountered, they parted company—the one being caught up to the invisible glory—the other, battered and bruised by the awful tempest, henceforth toiling along the road—alone.

But the “goodness and mercy” which, for so many years, had followed the two travelers, did not leave the solitary one; rather did the tenderness of the Lord “lead on softly,” and choose green pastures for the tired feet, and still waters for the solace and refreshment of His trembling child. He gave, moreover, into her hands a solemn charge—to help fellow-pilgrims along the road, filling her life with blessed interest, and healing her own deep sorrow by giving her power to relieve and comfort others.

- Susannah Spurgeon